Book Review - Things My Husband Says by Barbara Blue • Ana's Attic Book Blog

Things My Husband Says by Barbara Blue

Standalone comedy of true anecdotes

I have been following Barbara Blue on Facebook and always laugh at her posts. When I saw she was putting them all together in a book, I was so excited! Things my Husband Says by Barbara Blue is not fiction. It’s not romance. (Not really). It’s just a bunch of funny little short conversations between her husband and her.

One thing I really love is that Barbara has been married 25 years. She is a mom with older kids, she has blue hair. AND SHE STILL HAS SEX A LOT. So much that she has to have a 48 hour rule! (Which totally inspired me, thanks). I’ve been married 26 years, also have a 19 year old and have purple hair, and I STILL HAVE SEX A LOT. So she is kind of a soulmate.

My husband and I find a way to turn anything, literally ANYTHING dirty. Sometimes it doesn’t make sense, like yesterday, the garage door spring broke, and I got a “let me show you how well my spring works”. Or today he ran out to the store and I asked for a pound of meat for taco Tuesday and I got “I’ll pound you with my meat”. So Things My Husband Says by Barbara Blue is basically a funny version of what I live with every day, with lots of funny snark thrown in.

Him: Just give me 5 minutes. I’ll be quick.
Me: Do I look new to you?

I read this on a plane flight so it was really quick. They are short conversations, often just a line or two, followed by a funny custom emoji. I laughed a lot, and you know how you always laugh harder at the comedian who is basically talking about your life? The fact that we have such similar husbands made it even funnier to me. It’s basically her husband making everything about how he can get laid. #soundsfamiliar

Him: You know, semen has the same medicinal qualities as Pamprin and Midol. It’s on their label as a key ingredient. Google it. I mean gargle it. Now look what you did. You woke up the beast.

Likes:

The formatting, headers and emoji.
Easy to read parts in between other books, or just while you pee.
I laughed out loud a number of times.
Totally relatable.
I love how it demonstrates that a couple in their 40s, together forever, still want each other.
She mentioned Wicked Book Weekend!
There is no doubt about how much her and her husband love each other.
The warnings and acknowledgements at the beginning were epic.

Dislikes:

It got a little repetitive, especially when the punchline is “that’s going on Facebook” many times.
I wish there were some longer anecdotes thrown in both to help us get to know the couple a little more, and because I am sure she has some longer funny stories. I think it would have broken it up and been more personal and less repetitive.
She is sick in like 60% of the stories (more of a dislike for her sake rather than of the book).

The Down & Dirty:

This was a cute and funny visit into a real-life long-term marriage. It’s raunchy and gross at times (jellyfish? lol!) but that just makes it funnier. I think a lot of it shows why this marriage works so well, they have a ton of sex and a lot of laughs—the top two things you need for longevity in my eyes. Sometimes if the little story didn’t make me laugh, the emoji at the end would. It did get a little repetitive, and I wouldn’t have minded some longer scenes to break up the quick read, but all in all, a great little fast, funny read. I could see it being a coffee table book for adults that people can just thumb through and read a quick scene. I think I would have enjoyed it even more if I didn’t read it all at once and took my time, reading a few scenes between books or when I pee 🙂 but I just couldn’t stop!