Any book that has the word Penis in the title is bound to make me turn into a giggling 12 year old. So when I saw that The Princess & The Penis by R.J. Silver was less than 40 pages, I figured it would be a great little break between books, and good for a quick giggle.
The Princess and the Penis is about Princess Amalia from the Kingdom of Westwich. Her Father, King Norwood, insists on keeping her completely innocent and chaste because he wants to make sure Amalia remains “pure as fresh snow and as innocent as a fawn, until her beauty, kindness, and purity attracted a crown prince from one of the big kingdoms.” Norwood chooses Prince Rupert in the hopes he can help his impoverished kingdom thrive.
Amelia has 3 handmaidens and several guards around her at ALL times, so there is no chance of her virtue being compromised, and she is absolutely protected from learning about the facts of life. But one day, upon awakening, the princess complained of an awful night’s sleep. The reason is because of the “lump under her rump” all night long. Her mattress was replaced, her bed frame replaced, she was even moved to the tower, but still the writhing lump (described as long, hard and thick and bigger at the top like a mushroom, with 2 large apples on either side) continues it’s nightly visits.
This was really a funny, cute take on the Princess and The Pea. It wasn’t really pornographic, just silly. While I don’t think I quite laughed out loud, I enjoyed the whole story and found myself smiling and laughing inside the whole time.
Likes:
- A unique, cute concept that was fun to read.
- The Princesses two aunts were hysterical.
- The Phantom Phallus turned out to be much more!
Dislikes:
- $1.49 is too much for a book less than 40 pages. $.99 is perfect.
Rating: 3.75 stars 2 for Heat
This is a cute little book to grab as a break between big angsty reads. I was pleasantly surprised by how funny and clever it was. By the way, RJ is a man.









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