Welcome to today’s stop on the Love and Lists blog tour, sponsored by Madison Says.
Click the banner below for the tour schedule.
If you have been following my blog you know how much I love The Chocolate Lover’s Series by Tara Sivec. If you’ve read my reviews, you know of the scary things that happen to my body while I read her books. You know how Tara’s been sneaking into my home and secretly getting material, even before I
stalked her and made her got friendly with her. She also schedules her book releases to my vaginal episodes. More on that in a bit…(or read my review of Seduction and Snacks to start).
Just for a little background, you may want to check out these hysterical recaps of Wicked Book Weekend ’13 (most importantly the last two).
- Spiderman, Dirty Chocolate and Swag: Wicked Girls Book Weekend Day 1
- Chaos, Screaming and Signing: Wicked Girls Book Weekend 2013 Day 2
- Jell-O, Sex Toys, Vagibeer and Squirting: Wicked Girls Book Weekend 2103 Party Bus and Beyond
- Screaming Goats, Altered Ass, and Spooge in a Pot: Wicked Girls Book Weekend 2013-Sunday
You should also know that I messaged Tara after I read the chapter names and already started laughing. The first photo is an Always Maxipad.
Love and Lists is a spin-off of The Chocolate Lovers Series. But now, 4 year old Gavin is all grown up. Love and Lists can be read as a standalone, but don’t. Just trust me on this….read The Chocolate Lovers Series first. If it’s been a while, there is no need to brush up, Tara gently and hysterically reminds you of things throughout Love and Lists. The first half of the book is presented as if Gavin is telling us his story.
“You’re probably wondering why I’m curious if someone can die from blue balls. You’re probably also wondering how in the hell I can possible be twenty-five years old when just yesterday I was four.”
Gavin is in charge of product development at Seduction and Snacks, which has gone global, and he is completely in love with Charlotte, Liz and Jim’s daughter. The problem? They grew up together, and he’s been friend-zoned. He asks his best friend Tyler for help. Tyler is ‘Mini Drew’ to me, I swear he is Drew’s illegitimate child who has the hots for Claire. But I digress. Tyler helps Gavin come up with a list of how to make Charlotte fall in love with Gavin (or bang him).
“My main purpose in life isn’t to get in Charlotte’s pants. Sure, it’s something I dream about. Well, wet dream about. …but it’s not the ultimate goal. I want her to love me. I want her to see me as something other than a friend. I want her to realize that we’re soul mates.
Fuck, maybe I am getting my period.”
Neither Gavin or Charlotte have a lot of experience, so as Gavin worked his way down the list, it was one hilarious failure after another one. I felt so sorry for him, yet fell more in love with him every moment.
“You used to stand up in the middle of the tub and say. ‘Hey, Charlotte, look at my big wiener!’ I hope that’s not what your next plan of attack is,” Mom says with a serious look on her face. Note to self: remove number five from The List.”
The biggest issue is that Charlotte has a boyfriend, Rocco.
“Honey, he doesn’t have a feminine side, he has a vagina.”
And Gavin…well, he really hasn’t quite gotten over his obsession with his penis.
“I glance at Tyler standing next to me and notice he’s wearing corduroys. Those would feel really good right now if I rubbed my penis against them. All soft and rough at the same time.”
The whole gang offers Gavin advice, including Drew and Jenny…because they are actually qualified hahaha. And Gavin learns even more about his parents that he wishes he could unhear, including some stories about ‘phone calls’.
For me though, Tyler was a show stealer! From his Bronie status to Siri, he is everything I love in a guy 😉 Siri cracked me up…why? My kid’s named me “You Lick My Nipples” on my phone over a year ago, and I never changed it. And my son’s phone?
Halfway through the book we switch to Charlotte’s point of view. As much as I love Gavin, I love Charlotte just as much! It was perfect the way Tara split it and a great way of telling the story. Charlotte was even more inexperienced than Gavin.
Oh fuck, I’m touching his penis. My hand is on his penis. I was so excited I didn’t even realize how hard I was squeezing his penis. And thinking about it just makes me squeeze it even harder.
So basically, I was choking the life out of this thing and trying to detach it from his body. WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?!
Between mustard, hairy wildebeests, spiderman, and Children of the Corn (which I had a gif for but it scared me), Charlotte was as much of a mess as Gavin. They were perfect for each other.
Since Tara loves to do her “things I learned” posts, I thought I’d steal her idea.
- I didn’t think Tara could pull it off again, but this was just as funny as the rest, maybe even the funniest.
- Tyler. I Freaking loved him.
- The funny references to ‘the past’.
- The names of some products at Seduction and Snacks.
- Ava, Charlotte’s sister (I hope she gets a book!)
- The style of the storytelling…the way it’s obvious they are writing to an audience.
- Revisiting the whole gang when they are now my age.
- Bronies, Siri, Goats, Spiderman and moist folds.
- It was sweet, funny, sexy and ridiculous all at the same time.
- Love and Lists was surprisingly REAL, including banging heads, and all the mishaps that usually happen.
- Tyler’s crush on Claire and her reactions.
- The hospital visit.
- I wish it were a little longer. I read it in a few hours.
Rating: 5+++++++ Stars 2.5 Heat (The sex is more funny than horny inducing)
Yes, Tara and I are now friends, but I have never let that affect my ratings of a book (as you’ll see in an upcoming review for another author). But I must admit, now that I know her and I’m reading this book for the first time…Gavin is Tara. It used to be that Tara was Claire because I “met” Claire first. But Gavin is totally the male Tara. Which, if you read yesterday’s post, that’s not necessarily a bad thing.
Love and Lists was everything I could have wished for in a spin off. It was hysterically funny, sweet, silly, real and brought back the entire crazy cast of the original series and then some. I woke my husband from laughing, I had to take screen shots and send them to my him and my son (who wants a credit in this book by the way), and I re-read the whole thing while preparing this review because I loved it that much.
See the Chocolate Lovers Series Order with review links
Purchase Love and Lists by Tara Sivec (Chocoholics)
Amazon | Amazon UK | BN.com
Connect with the twatwaffle:
Amazon | Goodreads | Website | Facebook | Twitter
Meet Tara at Wicked Book Weekend ’14: Ft. Lauderdale (Tara does Spring Break!)
Interview with Gavin and Charlotte
When did you first know you were in love?
Gavin: The first time she punched me in the junk.
Charlotte: Awwww! You were such a little jerk when we were young. Can I punch you in the junk now just for old time’s sake?
Gavin: Not if you want that junk to continue working.
You’re both adults and made it through college without having any sex. Did everyone think you were gay?
Gavin: I think the amount of straight porn I watched made up for that fact. I have a gold membership to youporn.com
Charlotte: Seriously? A gold membership?
Gavin: What? It came with a card. A gold card. It’s in my wallet. It sparkles when the light hits it.
Charlotte: Are you sure you’re not gay?
Gavin: Have you already forgotten about last night? I counted the number of times you screamed “OH MY GOD! OH GAVIN! YES YES YES!” It was seven times, by the way. Seven.
Has anyone considered that Tyler might be Drew’s son from one drunken night?
Charlotte: Oh my God. You’re right. Tyler could totally be Uncle Drew’s son. They share a brain.
Gavin: It could be a possibility if Uncle Drew and Aunt Jenny ever stopped having sex with each other for one second.
You’ve obviously each been whacking off to fantasies of each other for a good 10 years. What are each of your number one fantasies?
Charlotte: When I used to help out my mom at her store during my summer breaks from college, I used to always imagine Gavin walking in with a UPS delivery. I’d thank him for bringing me the package and then take all of my clothes off. I’d put the “Closed” sign on the door and he’d open up the box and use every single toy on me in the back room.
Gavin: Sorry. I’m going to need a minute. Holy fuck. Seriously? You’re telling me this NOW? All those times I actually DID bring in one of Aunt Liz’s deliveries and you were thinking about ripping your clothes off? I think my brain just exploded.
Name 3 words to describe each other.
Charlotte: Hot, sweet, funny.
Gavin: Sexy, beautiful, gives good head.
Charlotte: Seriously, Gavin?
Gavin: What? It’s the truth. Fine. Sexy, beautiful and gives AMAZING head.
Invent a drink/shot (and a name) to describe each other.
Charlotte: The Numb Vagina. As soon as you drink it, you lose all feeling in your nether region.
Gavin: That’s not funny.
Charlotte: You’re right. It wasn’t funny AT ALL when it happened to me.
What is the best place you guys have had sex?
Gavin: Everywhere. I’d still like to take a blanket out to the field next to where Charlotte got that flat tire, but she won’t go for it.
Charlotte: Are you insane?! There are people lying in wait in that field, wanting to kill us. That is NEVER going to happen.
What is your favorite toy from Seduction and Snacks? (Please don’t say the Claire)
Gavin: Seriously? I just threw up in my mouth.
Charlotte: Actually, I kind of like The Claire. It comes in a make-up case so you can camouflage it.
Gavin: Do NOT tell me you used my mom’s sex toy.
Charlotte: You make it sound gross. Like I used a toy your mom used.
Gavin: I’m never going to be able to have sex again with that visual. Thanks a lot.
Have you guys ever used the Claire or Liz together?
Gavin: STOP! Oh my God, stop. I’m discontinuing those as soon as I get back to work. And then I’m going to stab myself repeatedly in the eye with a pen.
And what is the Jenny? Are there Skittles in it?
Charlotte: The Jenny is weird. I’m kind of afraid of the people who buy it.
Gavin: It’s a hand. Like, a fist, but not a fist. It’s kind of like a high-five. And there are Skittles on the tip of each finger. It’s disturbing.
Charlotte-What do you think is Gavin’s favorite thing about you? Gavin? What do you think is Charlotte’s favorite thing about you?
Charlotte: Obviously my blow job skills.
Gavin: You know I was just kidding. Although they ARE pretty stellar. I’m going to guess your favorite thing about me is my knowledge of all things sex toys.
Charlotte: He’s actually right. I’ve never met a man who carries his own sex toy arsenal everywhere he goes. It comes in pretty handy at restaurants.
Gavin: Too bad we’re never allowed at the Cheesecake Factory again after you ripped off the tablecloth and broke all the glasses.
Charlotte: It’s your fault for putting that remote-control vibrator in my underwear.
Name one random fact confession:
Charlotte: I once masturbated two feet away from Gavin when he was sleeping.
Gavin: WHAT? When? And why didn’t you wake me up?
Charlotte: It was in college and I didn’t think you liked me. You went to a party with me and passed out on the floor of my dorm. I may or may not have seen your penis that night when you changed your clothes. I got a little turned on.
Gavin: We’re going to your old dorm room NOW and reenacting this.
Charlotte: I don’t think the current residents would appreciate that very much.
Gavin: I DON’T GIVE A FUCK! THIS IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!
Question for Tara:
What is next in the Chocoholics series?
I’m toying around with the idea of Drew and Jenny doing a sex help book. Also, Ava and Tyler will be getting their own book.
Please Scroll for 2 New Giveaways. One from the tour, and one from me!
The Tour Giveaway: 2 winners will receive ebook copies of Love & Lists. 2 winners will receive signed paperback copies of Love & Lists. And the grand prize winner will receive a signed paperback copy of Love & Lists along with an L&L tote bag filled with fun swag! (Open everywhere).
My Giveaway: An e-book of any of Tara’s Books
a Rafflecopter giveaway
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Joanne Christenson says
This is by far THE BEST REVIEW….hilarious and I learned never to buy ny hubby medicated chapstick
Ginnie Hutto says
I have actually met her. In this order I 1) Swooned 2) Hugged her and 3) Compared and talked about tattoos.
I will hopefully be meeting Tara in March !! I think I would buy her a Numb Vagina shot and then stalk her all night!! 😉
Karen G. says
Sorry I’m not very original but I would say Hi! and ask for a picture with her. =D
I giggled like a madwoman when I read the medicated chapstick part. I MUST MAKE SURE I take over the chapstick buying responsibilities in our house STAT! 😀
Lorie Glowania says
I have actually met Tara and love her you can tell from her personality why her books are so funny and great
Oh my gosh…that interview!!
I have no idea – I am super shy so I would probably blush if I tried to talk to her. lol. Hopefully I could formulate words, and not make a complete ass out of myself. Simply say hey, and thanks for all the wonderful stories! 🙂
angie griffith says
Get a signed book
Laura Mendez says
Besides FREAK OUT a little…. 😉 She’s my imaginary BFF… so I’m sure we would have lots to talk about…. and shenanigans to plot.
Julie Kerr says
I would love to meet her, drag her to the nearest bar, and buy her a drink! To say thank you for making me laugh and brightening my day!
I would want to party with that girl!!
If it is allowed I would hump her leg!
Megan Wickland says
Haha! I just said the same thing! 🙂
Megan Wickland says
I’d likely fangirl and hump her leg. It would be embarrassing for all involved. I hope I get to meet her soon!! ♥♡♥ Ps….that video was hilarious!
Cara O says
Probably laugh when I remember her name and the association with the word twatwaffle
Alison Flores says
Sounds like a fun series! I look forward to reading them!
If I ever met Tara I’d probably have a total fan girl moment and shriek and pass out.
Alison Flores says
If I met Tara? I’d talk BOOKS of course!
Thank her,. thank her, thank her!!!
I would tell her how great her books are and give her a hug!
Jessie L says
I would tell her “Thank You” for giving me such LOL sexy books to read.
jodi marinich says
i would ask her where all her ideas for books come from
Kyla Stein says
Compliment her on her books
I would have a lot of questions to ask her! Thanks!
Melissa D says
After I unswallow my tongue, I would be asking for a photo and possibly and autograph. I love signed books!!!
Ashley Lynn says
Bounce around with happiness! And hope for a signed book!
Valerie Potjeau says
Things that happen when I hang with Tara
1. I get knocked up
2. I was raped by a dolphin
3. End up at a tattoo parlor at midnight, and save her from getting a jacked up quote.
Ana's Attic says
Did you get knocked up by the dolphin?
Marlene Engel says
I’d do a happy dance and ask her to sign my books.
Diana Doan says
I’d definitely fangirl out, lol. Thank you for the post and giveaway.
Debra Diaz says
OMG I totally met her at the NY signing and I totally fan girled and giggled when she noticed we were wearing the same color…..ahhhhh!!!!
Laina G says
introduce myself and ask for her autograph (and maybe a pic 🙂
Jenn K. Smith says
Was lucky enough to meet Tara at a book signing. Love her!
Lisa @ Oh Boy Oh Boy Oh Boy says
I met Tara last month and I totally fangirl geeked out and had nothing intelligent to say lol
Amber Gleisner says
I get to meet her in a couple of weeks! I am super duper excited!!!!!!
Amy Cox says
I loved this! I would love to meet Tara! Haha
Kim Perry says
Great interview! I would tell her how much I love her books and do a happy dance. Thanks for the giveaway!
Ana's Attic says
I thought it said boobs. I liked it better that way. Does that make me weird?
Tricia Zerbe says
Im going to have the privilege of meeting Tara in 17 days and Im planning on buying her a drink for the making me pmsl!!!!
I’d definitely fangirl on her books and pump her for future books, while trying not to be creepy. It would be hard but I would try 🙂
Mary Daniels says
I would introduce myself, and ask for an autograph!! I would be so excited!!
Mick Murphy says
I would probably ask for an autograph and act like a total fan girl. Thanks for the giveaway!
Totally party with her! 🙂
Ask her advice about writing. What inspires her and what motivates her.
Thank you for the wonderful giveaway.
Great Interview Ana’s Attic! I also laughed so hard I nearly peed on myself, my husband thought I was suffering from a sudden onset tourette’s syndrome ! If I met Tara I would totally act like a fan girl! She and Jasinda Wilder are my friends in my mind.( In a totally not creepy or stalker way at all 🙂 ) Thanks for the review! I will continue to pimp Tara’s books to anyone who will listen and those who don’t can suck it!
Jennifer Walls says
omg! I’m definitely downloading this book tonight!!!
Sue Pfannenstiel says
Get my picture taken with her. Lost the other one.
I would ask her how in the hell she comes up with this crazy stuff because it is absolutely gut busting hilarious!!
Gloria Landavazo says
Have A Total Fan Girl Moment, I Might Not Be Able To Talk For A while. She Might Get Bored With Me.
Love the review and the giveaway
Cassie Hoffman says
That’s easy, because she’s freaking awesome! I think I would have to borrow some of my nanny’s depends because I would piss myself laughing so hard around her :p
I would thank her for all the laughing, crying and peeing my pants I have gotten from her books!!
Ann T says
I would get her autograph!!
Leslie Rodriguez says
what an awesome giveaway. Thank you
Tell her how much I love her books!!
danielle james says
I love her!
Absolutely love Tara’s chocolate lovers series! Can’t get enough!
Meghan Stith says
I would ask her to sign a book!
Julie Cole says
Tell her how much I love her books!
Karina G. says
I would like to go out and hangout and drink! I say THANK YOU so much for one of my most favorite series ever! I recommend it to all my friends! I would ask her to autograph my books, and ask when we can do it all over again!!
Elizabeth Quinones says
Take a picture 🙂
Love Tara’s books!
Skye K. says
I found the character interview hilarious!!! And Id love to hang out with Tara, maybe talk about books or movies.
Yvonne C says
Find out how she comes up with the funniest stories ever. 😉
I would take her out with a bunch of my friends because I know we would drink and laugh all night!
Jennifer Jones says
Get and autograph and pic of course and tell her she’s to damn funny thanks for the great giveaway!!
Ask for an autograph!
Thanks for the chance to win!
Sheri Zee says
I already met her at the Boston book signing event in March! Had her sign a scrapbook page for me & took a picture with her. She’s all sorts of awesomeness!
Sabrina D. says
I actually just met her a couple weeks ago at the Phoenix author signing and loved her. I would like to sit and have a longer chat with her because she is really funny. Great fun to talk to. Thanks for the GA!
Scream like crazy……..
Lola Stark says
If I ever get the chance I will punch her in the Vag. What? It’s how a bitch shows love.
Beverly ignacio says
I will ask her for the recipes of claire’s sweets
Samantha Kurtz says
I would hope she would share her recipes!
Freak out in the inside but acting cool on the outside.:D
Ask for her recipes!! 🙂
I am going to meet her in Cleveland in April. I don’t want to scare her but I’m pretty sure I’ll dry hump her leg and kiss her cheek. I love her!!
Jan Richard says
I have read all of her books, they make me laugh out loud, cry, they are fantastic. I would love to meet her and find out what will happen next.
Suzanne H. D. says
Your review was awesome, and this book sounds like a great read. Hoping to win one 🙂 Good luck everyone.
Beg for more!! Always! 🙂
Maria Malaveci says
Hug her and possibly pee my pants!
beg her for more books!
Melissa Crisp says
I don’t get star struck so I would probably take her out so we could get drunk and laugh at other drunk people. And maybe pick her brain. ( not literally though )
Tamara Peterson says
I would totally fangirl it up…if I didn’t faint or pee my pants 😉
Andie Wardlow says
i would have a bunch of questions to ask, but will promptly forget how to talk when i get to meet her
Nasha Lama says
I would do a little be of fan girl :p and then talking talking and hug her hahaha and picture wuu
Nasha Lama says
I would do a little be of fan girl :p and then talking and hug her hahaha and picture wuu
Jen reilley says
Ask for an autograph.
Lea Marika says
If I met her, I would definitely jump and down like an idiot! Huge fan. Thanks for the giveaway!
Tianna Croy says
Scream like a goat, acting like a fool hug her and maybe even smack her ass!! LOL (Probably none of that, I’ll be too overwhelmed to do anything but act like an idiot)
I would totally lick her face and hump her leg!!!!! 😉
Angela Pratt says
I have met Tara! In Phoenix a while back. She was so much fun and so nice. I wish I could’ve stayed for the happy hour event. I would’ve had a goat calling contest with her!
Julie K says
I would probably talk her head off about ‘stuff’ that will not make any sense…..It’s what I do when I get nervous!!
Mel B says
I love these books I laugh from the time I open them to the time I close them.
Mel B says
I did meet her…she signed all my books and we even got to go eat lunch with her and a few others. It was a hoot we gave the waiter swag to give to his mother.
Natalie Gerber says
I’d tell her I love her writing.
Take a picture of course!
I was fortunate enough to have meet Tata at The Motor City book signing. She signed my books and was gracious enough to do a photo.
Cheryl Nasca says
Have I told you lately that I love you?!?!
Jennifer Nava says
I would most likely act a fool
I was lucky to meet her in Vegas…she’s a HOOOT! 🙂
I love Tara! I wigged the fuck out when I met her in Orlando at Book Bash!! She. Is. The. Best!!
Trenesha Bivens says
I had the pleasure of meeting Tara in Orlando at Book Bash…love her!
April W says
Love, love, love Tara’s books!!! Thanks for the giveaway!!